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Good behavior results from a stable parent child relationship

Healthy Parent-Child Relationships Healthy Parent-Child Relationships Healthy, functional relationships between children and their parents or other caregivers are characterized by the following.

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Increasing the presence of these characteristics in your relationships is a great way to improve commitment, communications, cooperation and consideration, and reduce stress and conflict as well!

Anticipating; doing before there is a problem ; letting the child know limits or conditions ahead of time. The ability to resolve and prevent conflict by sharing power within an authority relationship. The ability to offer choices within limits to encourage cooperation instead of obedience and people-pleasing.

  • Anticipating; doing before there is a problem ; letting the child know limits or conditions ahead of time;
  • The ability to work with administrators, support staff and parents without projecting blame or expecting or demanding that they take responsibility for solving problems you may be having with a particular child or group.

Alternative to win-lose powering or permissiveness. The ability to help a child succeed by giving clear directions, setting boundaries, offering opportunities to choose and negotiate, requesting age-appropriate behaviors and responses, accommodating individual learning style needs, giving opportunities to self-manage and staying in present time.

The ability to focus on what the child is doing right and building on strengths. The ability to create a reward-oriented environment in which consequences are positive outcomes and privileges that are received or experienced as a result of cooperation.

The ability to communicate positively using promises instead of threats, or reward instead of punishment, for example. The ability to maintain a sense of humor.

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Alternative to negativity and punitive orientation. The ability to interact and communicate with a child in ways that would be acceptable to an adult. The willingness to accept the fact that child require meaningful, positive outcomes for their efforts, just as adults do. The ability to connect what you want with what the child wants in positive ways. The ability to motivate and reinforce cooperative behavior with outcomes other than adult approval or avoidance of negative adult reactions shaming, criticism, abandonment.

The willingness to withhold positive consequences until the child has held up his end of the bargain. The ability to immediately intervene when a child has violated the conditions or limits of a boundary, avoiding warnings, delayed consequences, punishment, or praise.

The ability to maintain congruence between personal values and behavior. The ability to hear and respond according to inner guidance and personal values. The ability to act within personal value system despite potential or actual criticism from others.

  • The child observes how the primary caregiver responds to them and to other people around them;
  • Each of these factors helps the child develop a healthy attachment to their parent;
  • The ability to distinguish between self-care and selfishness;
  • The willingness to make decisions based on what is best for a particular child or the family, rather than simply, automatically following tradition or doing what others expect you to do;
  • The ability to offer choices within limits to encourage cooperation instead of obedience and people-pleasing.

The willingness to make decisions based on what is best for a particular child or the family, rather than simply, automatically following tradition or doing what others expect you to do. The ability to withstand judgment, criticism and ridicule if necessary, without becoming defensive, apologetic or reactive. The ability to take responsibility for feelings, without attempting to make others responsible. The ability to express feelings in non-hurtful ways. The ability to depersonalize and resolve conflict.

The ability to work with administrators, support staff and parents without projecting blame or expecting or demanding that they take responsibility for solving problems you may be having with a particular child or group.

Healthy Parent-Child Relationships

The ability to identify personal needs and feelings, set boundaries, take time for self, self-validate and get help when necessary. The ability to distinguish between self-care and selfishness. The ability to feel deserving of self-caring behaviors and decisions. The ability to use mistakes and failures as opportunities for new goals, strategies or growth.

The ability to self-forgive.